I shall fall asleep under the stars in the back of a pick up, on a mattress, with my sleeping bag, listening to the crickets chirp and the owls hoot. I shall wake up to a sunrise and be reminded life is absolutely magnificent.
Monday, June 13, 2016
Sunday, June 12, 2016
Thanks Sign Guys
I drive past this sign on a daily basis. I aways get excited when I see that the quote has changed. I noticed yesterday that this was the new one...
Wednesday, June 08, 2016
To The Man Who Checked Out On His "Step Child"
I write this in anger and in haste. Part of me feels like I should stop now while I am ahead however we are speaking of a little girl and the long lasting effects one adults choice will have on her.
From the age of 2 my ex had been in Emma's life. When she was 3 she started calling him dad. He was her dad. She knew at a very young age she had a biological dad whom she saw from time to time however- this man whom she called dad- was her dad.
When we separated in 2012- Emma still called this man dad. She still spent time equally with him. Then- we had to move. Not by choice. I had to go where the work was. Emma came with me. The boys stayed with David and visited me. The moment we had to leave the city that both parents shared- he checked out. He stopped calling. He made no plans. He and his girlfriend were pregnant and decided that they were going to go off in the sunset without Emma in their lives.
Right before we returned back into the country in 2015 I asked Emma's "Dad" if she could spend time with him- he wanted to leave it to the courts. Court wasn't until November. Then December. Then January. Then April... Two years went by where her "Dad" cut off all communication and a simple hello and hug was exchanged whenever she saw him at pick up and drop offs with her brothers.
2 years to Date and still- this little girl yearns for her Dad.
This last week- The courts saw her 'Dad' and deemed him just as that. He may not have a drop of biological ties with Emma however- he was her parent and is now considered such and is being held responsible for acting as such. I asked specifically for a parenting agreement. Me. The opposing party. Wanting her 'Dad' to spend time with her. This is usually not the situation in a court room.
The court asked if he wanted time with his little girl.
He never answered.
The Justice asked if he ever loved this little girl.
His response.... 'sure'.
His lack of response sent shock waves through the judge, the security guard and the stenographer. All of us stared at him in hopes of the right answer. All the judge could say was he was shocked and shook his head in disbelief.
After some time-His lawyer stated "Mr.Sykes would NOT like time with Emma"
My tears flooded the desk. The judge let out a disappointed sigh and the security guards mouth dropped.
Now, I have to explain to my little girl why, in her words, 'No one wants to be her Dad'.
I, myself, struggle to understand. I struggle to accept that someone can just hit the eject button after 10 of being in a relationship with a child based on distance. But, it's now not the task at hand. I don't need to understand. I need to look forward.
There is no looking back now. I spend each day loving her as much as possible. I spend each day telling my daughter that she is wanted and that she has people in her life who want and love her....
From the age of 2 my ex had been in Emma's life. When she was 3 she started calling him dad. He was her dad. She knew at a very young age she had a biological dad whom she saw from time to time however- this man whom she called dad- was her dad.
When we separated in 2012- Emma still called this man dad. She still spent time equally with him. Then- we had to move. Not by choice. I had to go where the work was. Emma came with me. The boys stayed with David and visited me. The moment we had to leave the city that both parents shared- he checked out. He stopped calling. He made no plans. He and his girlfriend were pregnant and decided that they were going to go off in the sunset without Emma in their lives.
Right before we returned back into the country in 2015 I asked Emma's "Dad" if she could spend time with him- he wanted to leave it to the courts. Court wasn't until November. Then December. Then January. Then April... Two years went by where her "Dad" cut off all communication and a simple hello and hug was exchanged whenever she saw him at pick up and drop offs with her brothers.
2 years to Date and still- this little girl yearns for her Dad.
This last week- The courts saw her 'Dad' and deemed him just as that. He may not have a drop of biological ties with Emma however- he was her parent and is now considered such and is being held responsible for acting as such. I asked specifically for a parenting agreement. Me. The opposing party. Wanting her 'Dad' to spend time with her. This is usually not the situation in a court room.
The court asked if he wanted time with his little girl.
He never answered.
The Justice asked if he ever loved this little girl.
His response.... 'sure'.
His lack of response sent shock waves through the judge, the security guard and the stenographer. All of us stared at him in hopes of the right answer. All the judge could say was he was shocked and shook his head in disbelief.
After some time-His lawyer stated "Mr.Sykes would NOT like time with Emma"
My tears flooded the desk. The judge let out a disappointed sigh and the security guards mouth dropped.
Now, I have to explain to my little girl why, in her words, 'No one wants to be her Dad'.
I, myself, struggle to understand. I struggle to accept that someone can just hit the eject button after 10 of being in a relationship with a child based on distance. But, it's now not the task at hand. I don't need to understand. I need to look forward.
There is no looking back now. I spend each day loving her as much as possible. I spend each day telling my daughter that she is wanted and that she has people in her life who want and love her....
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