Jumping Ship

I was told that I jump ship. I replied with- "it's better to jump ship than watch it sink".

I keep coming back to this quote and I ponder which is better- to jump ship or sink.

Now if I jump- I can avoid the pain of having to endure with sinking (now that I REALLY think of that- I don't even know if that's true). You have to deal with the pain of watching it sink. Seeing the loss and this is pretty damn shitty. When you feel the ship is going to sink... well... why not get off before you're taken with?... why put yourself in the position where you have to feel all that pain associated...
Just make sure that before you jump -the ship is indeed going to sink.....

Fast forward. Ships underwater. Ships can sometimes be restored. It's a rare occurance but its not impossible either. Like relationships are comparable to the sunken vessels- there are a lot of factors that come into play.

Stratification and contamination.

Stratification in technical terms are the formation of layers onto an object (sediment). Compare that to a fallen relationship- it's the residue you feel- the heart ache, the feelings of resentment, the anger, etc, etc. It all falls on this mess down below and builds. Slowly, ever so slowly, it settles.

Problem is- can this mess be cleaned up and is a ship that has sunk worth restoring??

And for the record- if I jump ship- it's not because there is a waiting ship near by- it's into the water and I'm waiting for someone to hand me a life jacket.

The Curve

I took a long journey of self discovery this year. There were so many bumps and detours along the way. Looking back- of course I ask myself on some of these things- 'what the hell were you thinking?!"

But... that's how one grows.

So- without further hesitation:

I learned that I have so much love to give-  I need to give it to the right person.

I learned that my time here is short. Too short. I need to be sure to remember that and do what I want to do without making an excuse or barrier. Just do it already.

 I need to be patient. That right individual will be there when I least expect it.

Opportunity in a crisis- I am getting REALLY good at finding this now

How much I tolerate- that this is indeed a choice- there is no one forcing me to put up with anything. I make the decision just how much I choose to tolerate. I also make the decisions based on what I want to tolerate (ex. how I wish to be treated, professionally- what I want and how much I wish to give to get what I want)

I still do not run on linear time. :)

I learned that being perfect- its a matter of perception- and standard. I choose how high to raise the bar and just how far Im willing to go to go above and beyond.

I learned just how fabulous my friends are. I thought they were fabulous before- they are spectacular individuals who I am so blessed to have in my life.

I learned that there is never enough lettuce in the fridge. Or egg whites. Or Pickles.

I love East Indian food!

... Pre schoolers Hate sharing... btw... I thought I knew the extent of this- boy was I wrong!

I can make cookies from scratch- sans recipe and on the fly from pretty much anything in a pantry.

I realized my love for Kohlrabi. And Cajun Spice. Yup. Oh so delicious.

I have an intolerance to milk so I cut back.

I now have the patience of a flea when it comes to shopping (ya, you read that right)

I dislike gossip- I used to be all over it but I now become super annoyed when it occurs and usually will put a stop to it

I can fall asleep in  .kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

Hot Yoga is my new friend. Cycling- not so much. However, both serve a purpose so I shall keep at it.

Life doesn't have a plan- you make the plan. You change the plan. Plans are meant to be changed.

I am wayyyyy more aware of who I am and what I want than I was 12 months ago.

Well Stated.

Social Media Via Gym and Onesiee and Elmer Fudd Vest

I am the epitome of fashion right now...

Merry Christmas

Christmas was quite different this year. I had the kids in the morning which was fantastic but come noon- my world turned into a very lonely place.

SO I baked. And baked. And baked some more.

After about 15 lbs of baked good sat on my counter I packed it up, went down to 106th street right beside Chinatown and handed out cookies and muffins to the homeless.

I must say- all feelings of self loathing and loneliness disappeared when I saw the lineup to get into Hope Mission. It was circling around the building. It was awkward at first- I didn't know how to start... so I simply said--- care for a cookie? The look on their faces and the gratitude shown was heart wrenching. I gave bag fulls of cookies away. I was asked why I did this- I simply said- why not?

It was great to just escape my world for a while and realize that life just isn't that bad. I really have it great. I have a 3 amazing children, a roof over our heads, a warm bed and food on the table every night. Sure- sharing it with someone would ideal but who am I to complain when there are people out there who cannot even lay there head down for a moment to rest?

So with that- I will say Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy your families, friends and loves ones. And more importantly- be thankful for what you have and take a moment to really enjoy just that.

I was in my office last week (Remedy on Jasper) and something horrible happened. They painted the restrooms. I am actually completely devastated. Considering going to the one on 109th.

Now if you have never been to Remedy you are probably scratching your head asking why.

The photo post below- was actually taken in the bathroom stall at Remedy. The bathroom was full of quotes, drawings and artwork galore. Every trip was an adventure. I always ended up taking a photo of something or another (who doesn't bring their phone into the restroom with them?).

Anyhow, I've bitched and complained. They painted a chalkboard hallway but how not cool is that when you can erase all that is drawn. So you can filter crap? Erase what you don't want to see?

Not impressed Zee.

Ok then.

Advice from a bathroom stall. ... quote number 3457876...

Clutter

I needed silence. So I went off the grid today.

Everything seems to just be overly loud and overbearing right now.

Really- I just want my best friend, a stiff glass of the Zen, a collection of bad movie to warch a couple of asprin for the next morning. Maybe even a bag of skittles ( I hate skittles but the word is a fun one).

I want answers and in time that will come.... can anyone direct me to the remote where the fast forward button is....

'I WANNA BE SEDATED' and Other Songs Skipping Through My Head

Im waiting ever so patiently for the doctor (whom bt the way is a fantastic Asian connection if I want to get on a soft ball team- he reminds me of this every visit). I am the patient who always has to be told to 'hop on up'. I try to avoid the table as much as possible. The table represents the thousands of patients before me who have parked their naked asses on the same exact bench.

Shiver.

The thought makes me wonder if I should be asking for a SRI or some sort of sedative to calm my anxiety when approaching Rm. 4 instead of my usual Clostridium botulinum....

now go forth and google my friend so you can figure out just what im here for ;)

What the hell is THAT button for?!

Here I sit

So here I am... at Remedy... doing instant replay in my head. Trying to gather all these jumbled thoughts and feelings and place them back into their perspective pieces. In a way I am deathly afraid of stepping out of this place for fear of losing it entirely (yes, Im delaying the inevitable). Sigh.

I order a Chai (again) and thank Nate. He is especially aware of my somber state and gives me extra topping on my drink. I am tempted to purchase the entire cake in the showcase and go underground in the LRT and give it out to the homeless just to lift my spirits. I would say it eat but .. well... haha.. that so would not happen.

... for now I will throw myself into work and delay this awful feeling from growing.

Hurry Up

The hardest part of the saying "things happen for a reason" is waiting for that reason to come along...

Ughhh

My first Hanukkah

This was my first Hanukkah this year. I learned a lot. I even attended a service at the synagogue.  I must say- I'm intrigued with the Jewish way.  There is one day left. I will light a virtual candle as the menorah I have been lighting will not be accessible tonight.

To all- Happy Hanukkah or as they say in Hebrew...Chanukah Sameach!!!

Scared as hell

Being vulnerable sucks. Its scary. What is even more so is when others know how emotionally available you are and that in itself can be a daunting situation (for example- you dont know just what that other person will do or how they will respond to your vulnerability).

Im at a point in life where I recognize that when things become excessively fearful I run for the hills. If I come to a crossroads where there is a possibility of getting hurt I will often hurt myself and cut ties with the scenario to guard myself.

I'm learning that breathing is the first step to managing this little issue of mine... then perhaps wine. Lots of wine...

Slowing Down

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkL4FttgUC8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Its the calm before the storm. I literally have 15 min left of free time and I realized I have not updated my blog in over a month.

Life has been on a full forced ride to the moon and I'm just heading back.

The opera was incredible. I met some amazing people and experienced some amazing things.

The heart gallery wrapped up and was a huge sucess. I thought I understood the reasoning behind it but it wasn't until I heard a panel of teens talk about WHY the reasons they want a family and what it's like being in the care of the province. It was heart wrenching. I cried.
The photos turned out wonderful and at the mini launch I was presented with a plaque and a thank you gift.  To be honest- seeing the excitement in the kids eyes when they sae their picture on a giant canvas was the best reward. Now hopefully- it will find them a home...

http://www2.canada.com/edmontonjournal/news/story.html?id=adf59457-3edf-459e-a80e-dd48deb5503e

http://www.cbc.ca/m/touch/canada/edmonton/story/1.2435960

!!!Moving Day!!!

So I am finally moving out of the hood today!!! Im beyond elated.  Cannot wait to relax and really unpack. The kids are so excited as well (Alexander requested that his bed be placed in the closet (boys room has a walk in). Emma asked for blue walls (blue, really?) and Dominic wishes for a fort in the pantry. Sigh. I have my work cut out for me. :)

Pre School Photos

I was asked to do pre school photos for a primary school in Sherwood Park. There are over 60 kids in the program and I have been super busy with editing as of late.... I am super excited however with how they are turning out!

Tune into CTV next week! They are hosting a interview for the heart gallery and I eill be featured! So excited!

True story.

Curve Ball

Just. Breathe.

What I want to do EVERY Sunday

So I got a tiny cut at Opera last week on the stage. Well.... Sir Flesh Wound got bigger. Then the swelling started. Now, I have a new friend 'Ivan' who will administer a strong dose of anitbiotics because I now have lymphagitis.

I could really use a chai at this moment.

Good Bye Salome

What an amazing production. I'm so sad it's over.  All in all it was said to be one of the most amazing opera's performed in Edmonton to date! I am so honored to be a part of it.

Love This Song...

Thank You October

WOW! I cannot believe October is almost gone. I have to admit- this was a challenging month. With the Opera consuming most of my evenings, the Heart Gallery eating up most mornings and then on top of that training there has been little down time. I have done a tremendous amount of growing however.

 

The opera was my saving grace even if the schedule was insane. I made many new friends and I am playing a new role that really allows to express myself and let go. At dress rehearsal last night I had the pleasure of really connecting with the music- it was very cathartic in a way. I am so looking forward to the next 3 performances and really diving in.

 

The heart foundation is another story. The kids were amazing. Heart breaking however. I wanted to take most of those kids home. Each child had a story to tell. Each child has so many obstacles they have to over come and my hope is that those obstacles will be lessened with a permanent placement. I hope that I can at least have some part in that with the photos I took. My wish is that some how a family will see if only one of these children and make a better life for them.

 

Relationships- I have done almost a complete month of 'just rediscovering me'. I didn't realize just how much that was needed. I learned A LOT.

I have recognized just how little value I was placing on myself and what I deserve. That sounds horrible. I know I put up with too much bullshit in the past. Trusted too easily. Trust is something that is earned- not a free pass to anyone who wishes to have it.  I also now realize that protecting my heart is essential. I fell to hard, to fast, to quickly. This doesn't mean I have constructed my own version of the great wall around it- I just don't let any and everyone play with it anymore. I believe the correct term would be- BOUNDARIES. Yes- there are more clear and defined boundaries now.  

 

I also got a reminder. A reminder that life is far too short. It passes by too quickly at a rate that no one can change. There is no knowing when it will end. When your time is essentially- over. I watch a family agonize and mourn over a brother, a son, a father, a husband, a man that left this lifetime too early. I hear the pain and its heart breaking. There is no time stamp- no clock to count down to. One can only savor the moments and appreciate each breathe there is to take. That being said- I have made a conscious effort to live more with an increased appreciation. To soak up those special moments and dive into the opportunities as they come with less reservation (of course- with the proper boundaries in place because god only knows- life is too short also to waste time as well!). To reach harder for those goals. To not fear the chance of failure or success because - well, it happens.

 

Time for me to finish off this month with a Bang.

 

NOW- Go buy your damned Opera tickets. And don't forget to bring in a few small bottles of Gin. Or vodka. Or whatever the hell is your preference.

 

Till next time.

 

XOXOX

Please world.. .. Slow down... if only for a bit

Rod Stewart At Remedy

Last week- I swear he was there...

I Promise...

Please follow the link...

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In Memory of my Brother. Jeffery Edmonds

Oct 13th, 2013 @ 09:27 pm › Tony Retrosi
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10/13/2013     Today at 12:30 PM my youngest brother JEFFERY EDMONDS lost his battle with cancer.

“Even the strong show signs of fatigue.” Friedrich Nietzsche

My brother said this to me once. At the moment, I have a deep and un-abiding understanding of it.

Chris, Thom, JEFF, Tony

Things I’ve earned from my brother Jeffery Lee Edmonds

People don’t actually change that much. Since Jeff was younger than me, I got to see him grow up a little. Obviously he’s changed a lot. But in many ways, he’s also very much the same. The sensitive, gentle demeanor he’s had since he was younger never left him. He’s always had a dry sense of humor, a deep love of food, an infectious laugh, and a tendency to get lost in his own world.
I think this a good reminder for everyone, especially when we get stuck in the toxic pattern of wishing we were different or more like so-and-so, that many of our personality traits and preferences seem to be hardwired from a very young age, and that’s pretty cool.
You can be smart, cultured, and mature, and still think nothing in the world is funnier than a poop joke. If there’s anything I’ve learned from my three smart, funny, well-informed, sensitive, thoughtful brothers, it’s that there is no shame in scatological humor. Jeff, specifically, is capable of discussing the nuances of philosophical belief systems, building a super computer, and writing a dystopian novel, and he still cracks up at the mere mention of the words “poop” or “butt.” The lesson here? Let your poop joke flag fly!
Appreciate Nature. No one I know had a bigger and better appreciation of the world around him. Spot the natural beauty of the mountains, t
LAUGH at yourself. At Thanksgiving one year in front of the entire family and his girlfriend (soon to be fiancee) I managed to spill my entire plate of food onto my lap. I was horrified. Our eyes made contact and we both just started laughing. Sometimes in life things are going to be messy and not go the way you want. Laugh at it and move on. Today- just about the time of Jeff’s last breath, I dropped a potato on the floor in a restaurant. I said, “that one’s for Jeff.”
Stop procrastinating. When Jeff first moved with his family to Maine from St. Louis my wife went up to help paint some rooms in his house. They were up nearly all night painting and Jeff spoke of his goal of writing a novel. His time on this planet expired before he was able to finish. Get off your ass and finish your goals. Jeff was a writer.
He always wanted to write a novel. He just ran out of time. We have have things we wanted to do but come up with excuses on why we can’t do it.

No excuses, promise me you will follow through with your goals. 

Jeff

This moment is your life.– Your life is not between the moments of your birth and death.  Your life is between now and your next breath.  The present – the here and now – is all the life you ever get.  So live each moment in full, in kindness and peace, without fear and regret.  And do the best you can with what you have in this moment; because that is all you can ever expect of anyone, including yourself.
I have just learned that A lifetime isn’t very long.– This is your life, and you’ve got to fight for it.  Fight for what’s right.  Fight for what you believe in.  Fight for what’s important to you.  Fight for the people you love, and never forget to tell them how much they mean to you.  Realize that right now you’re lucky because you still have a chance.  So stop for a moment and think.  Whatever you still need to do, start doing it today.  There are only so many tomorrows.

I stand upon the ocean shore.

As a ship at my side opens her sail

to the morning breeze and begins to glide

across the water blue.

She is a beautiful sight.

I stand and watch her as she glides

with grace and strength into the clouds

on the horizon.

Just where the sky and the ocean meet

and come to mingle with one another.

When I hear someone cry out,

“She is gone.” and I must turn and say to them,

“Yes, but gone only from sight.”

For within the mind and heart she can always

be found.

For life is eternal,

Love is immortal,

and death is only a horizon,

and a horizon is nothing save the limits of our sight.

And, just at the moment when someone says, “There, she is gone,”

there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices

ready to take up the glad shout, “Here she comes!”

And that is dying…

Death comes in its own time, in its own way.

Death is as unique as the individual experiencing it.

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Related posts:

1. Letter to Tony 1993
2. Reflections: What A wonderful World
3. Drinking, Stealing and Swearing. Things my Mom Taught Me! Happy Mothers Day
4. How to Deal with a Bad Week
5. Parents, Coaches, Teachers & Owners – “Building A Champion” Part 2

Categories: General Coaching, Uncategorized, Weekly Momentum
Tags: Memorial

   
   
 
 

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Thank You Mother Nature

Happy Fall!

I just finished a shoot down at the legislature building...its amazing down here! If you get a chance to take a walk I highly suggest it!

To my Best Friend

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6kEh0ichiI&feature=youtube_gdata_player

For Jeff.

Untitled

Morning Shenanigans at GLF

At the gym right now- my bike is having a full blown temper tantrum because its telling me I'm supposedly under my minimum RPM's. I keep swearing at the damn thing because my legs are telling me this cannot be the case as they are on fire today.

 

The dude next to me. 2 things. No deodarant and hes got a severe case of halitosis so his panting is unbearable. The best I can describe it is wind coming from a feed lot. Yes. That's a great description. I wish my olfactory nerves would calm the hell down if only for 30 more minutes.

 

There is a person on a stairmaster in front of me. Im trying to decided if its male or female. Clearly if female she's on a high dosage of steroids. I'm thinking its female (it has a ponytail under the hat). I'm a little scared.

 

There is an overly enthusiastic personal trainer working with his client. He's doing the "ya, push it. Oh ya, that's it. Come on- one more. One more... yesssssss........" you can imagine just how hard I am working to contain myself.

 

Beep. Beep.

 

Yes, I know. Back to work tells my bike....

 

Ciao for now!

Muscial Orgasm

Music. AHHHH- Music. I cannot imagine a world without it. Music has the ability to move me in so many different ways. I can hear a song that reminds me of someone and be completely turned on or off by it. I can hear a classical piece and be totally brought into a state of clarity and zen. And then there is music that can make me run in the opposite direction as fast as possible.






This piece- is beyond beautiful....

Come With Me

Look on forward
Hope to see more

 

When I peak through the window
Of a solid oak door

 

Nothing you say, nothing at all

You say there is nothing behind this wall

 

I know what's to be, I know in my heart

I point myself in the direction to start

 

I shall climb. Or demolish. I will break it down.

This door may be locked but Ill find my way 'round

 

Doubt ahead, don't believe, its ok

Ill show you your wrong, then lead you the way

 

Thursday- The Bet is ON

To my best friend. You will lose this bet.

Potpourri Latte, Please

She's Too Young

 

Don't hate me because I've made mistakes and am less adoptable.
Love me because I need you.

T.reTroSi.

 

 

Heart Gallery Tugging Away

Today I met Christian.

He is 8 years old.

He has a horse named Andy.

A foster brother named Jonathan.

We played bears and

Today- I received 5 hugs from a little boy

who "doesn't hug"

Today- Christian and I danced in the leaves,

played hide and go seek, we raced down the path (where I graciously lost)

 

Today- I hope I made a good memory for this young lad.

 

 



Just An F.Y.I

I kinda miss you.

Good Morning Donkey

Silence Can Be Deafening

Capsuled

Say'n It All

I tried to be perfect
But nothing was worth it
I don’t believe it makes me real
I thought it’d be easy
But you don't believe me
I meant all the things I said

If you believe it’s in my soul
I’d say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I’m trying to let you know
That I’m better off on my own

This place seems so empty
My thoughts are so tempting
I don’t know how it got so bad
Sometimes it’s so crazy
I feel no one can save me
But it’s the only thing that I have

If you believe it’s in my soul
I’d say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I’m trying to let you know
That I’m better off on my own


.........................................................Thanks T.

FAKE iT.

Somtimes, I will choose to be awesome even when I don't really want to be. My want eventually follows my actions though. :)

So when shit doesn't go your way, force your chin up, put a smile on your face and fake it for a while.  Eventually you will start to believe this little stunt you are pulling is not really a stunt at all...

Nothing But...

Today I shall be nothing short of amazing.

Leaves underfoot, the season has changed
Leaving behind the summer rain
Looking to midnight, the days are behind
Waiting no longer for that October sky
Riding the wind, breathe deep and stay calm
Not looking back, the wind carries on

Better left on Paper

Or not said at all

Escape from your Mind

Placed on a wall

Salome....it had begun.

Warp

Travel through time
Only certain thing stay
Certain things that look
Only my way

98 Days to Deadline

 

Has nothing he can call Fame
He Hides his head in Shame
He's got no one to blame
He's just a Pawn in their game

By T.Retrosi

 

I have 98 days to finish my collection of shots for my book. I have vowed to do one shot a day that may be considered. So- Away I go.

Got an idea?  Send  it my way and I will mention you!

Have a piece of writing you want to contribute to a specific photo?

Share it and you'll receive credit if used in the book!

Untitled

A slight brush of wind
Sprints though my veins
Shivers in places
I dare not name

Thank Goodness!!!

Clouding Thunder

There is nothing worse than seeing a child spill emotions down her cheeks and not being able to dig deep and remove whatever is the cause of this rain.

All I can do is bring out my silliness and splash around for a bit.

 

The Panera Way...

Ok- you are wondering what is this I speak of.

I bring this up ONLY because this happened twice at the Big S in Sherwood Park and I feel the sudden need to rant about it.

I go in this morning to order my tea. I ask for a grande Vanilla Rooibos tea in a Venti cup (this means one tea bag) with 3/4 hot water and steamed soy to top it off.
The charge: 4.78

Does anyone else see the issue with this???

Most of the time- I pay 2.68 for a tea and a splash of milk. Today- I am charged for a latte.
The reasoning the say is to pay for the LABOR of STEAMING the Soy. However, a latte consists of the use of their syrup. What happens when I do not use syrup. Clearly it is inappropriate to charge for something that isn't in its entire entity? Think of it this way- it is like purchasing a chicken salad without the chicken- therefore making it a SALAD.  Or even better, a cheeseburger without the cheese thus making it a GRILLED CHEESE. Is this making conclusive sense???

The manager and I had quite the discussion customer service and the absolute overcharge of simply paying double the amount of what I would pay if they would just charge me for a tea with a splash of soy ($2.68) instead- they are making a latte charge.

I then asked them to place the soy in  then put in the microwave for 45 seconds. They were unable to accommodate me.

I left that location with manners in tow (no need to make an Emmy winning production over tea) and simply went to one in Edmonton where they were more than happy to meet my needs and not attempt to overcharge me.

New Thought.
I am guessing this will have to happen.
Get a kids Soy Steamer (1.25)
 Bring my own freaking tea bags which I purchased at 50 cents per bag.
Request 2 venti cups of 3/4 hot water.
Make my own damned tea.
Voila.
Its actually half the cost of 2 teas.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NOW- why the title?

There is this lovely restaurant in the USA that is called Panera Bread.

They have two rules for their company.

#1- Always say yes to the customer- the customer is always right. You never say no, they keep coming back...

#2- Never hire assholes

Really. That's it. It's that simple. Makes perfect sense.

Life on Whyte

 I was skipping down Whyte Ave this weekend and a female busker stood perched on a flower bed, playing a guitar and singing a song. I passed her once and didn't really pay attention. Sure, I heard her but I sure as heck wasn't listening. The second time I past- It was like someone hit me in the face with a frying pan. Her voice was incredible. Such that I actually was 10 paces in front, stopped dead in my tracks, turned around and placed 20 bucks in her guitar case.

She looked at me with tears in her eyes and said- "thank you so much. You just made my day"

Guess what- she made mine.


Poem Man

'Poetry for sale- Get it while its hot!'

This guy is actually pretty cool. A friend of mine was with me and bumped into another friend on the corner of Whyte and 107th. There sat this man in a top hat, his typewriter (yes, a typewriter) and a journal with pullout pages. He said "Hello miss would you like to buy a poem- fresh off the press".
I got talking with him. He actually was really quite interesting. He writes about 30-40 poems in a day and charges $8 a poem. This is all he does. He got the idea from another busker down south in the USA. People flock to him for live poems. Love poems. Poems about their girlfriends. Poems about the weather. Their dog. Their evil exes... the list goes on.

Lesson to be learned- Open your ears. Ask more questions. There are some really cool people out there with some really interesting stories.

Not So Impossible

A hole is meant to be filled. A hole should never exist for a long period of time because,eventually, it will grow and then become harder to fill. Some may call one crazy for trying to fill a round hole with a square dowel- however, little does this person realize that there is such thing as sandpaper...........

Shit I Enjoy Today

Boston Fender
Clean Sheets fresh out of the dryer - HELLO WARMTH!
Crispy leave underfoot
Scarfs
A perfect pear (It was delicious)
Bubbles from my bath
5 am FRESH AIR! (seriously- even my upstairs neighbor is questioning the sideways neighbors existence at this point)
A strong cup of coffee
New Neon Socks
A new Song
Ultimate Guitar Tabs (thank you for so many versions that DO NOT include an F!)
The lovely voice coming from the Busker on Whyte
A lovely kick in the Ass from a friend (figuratively, not literally)

The Search

There are times in your life when you meet someone that you make a connection with but simply cannot comprehend even why the connection is there. It just... is.

Someone who you share your thoughts with and know that they will never judge- just listen...

Someone you can trust completely and know that they will never break that trust.....

Someone who makes your heart swell with happiness with just a little thought.....

Who can make your day complete with just a smile...

Someone who you can share your silence with...

Someone who brings out  YOUR smile with such ease and confidence....

Someone who you can spend an entire afternoon searching in there eyes and then realize a part of you was missing up until that very moment....

Someone Who...

 

When or If you find this connection- Don't question why.  Just receive and embrace it. Because it can be gone in an instant.

Runing, Running, Running...

My view of yesterdays jaunt. Hello bridge. You are excessively long.

People Of Remedy

I sit here at my "office", people watching. It's almost time for the lunch rush and things are about to get a little unhinged. My brain is in overdrive and I cannot seem to focus on a single thing.  My attention span is that of a gnat. Yes, fleeing every which way.

Anyhow, I thought I would share the everyday people I encounter because I believe they all are very interesting people.

Bouncy Ball Guy:

He is a security officer somewhere in the downtown core. He comes to Remedy in the evening- often bringing his laptop. The kicker with him- He always has these small little bouncy balls he gives to women (I have 3 now). I am unsure of why. He goes out of his way to order them online and just goes up to women (JUST women) and asks "would you like a ball?" Yes, I have 3 of his balls and now that I say this Im really questioning his motive.

Mary

Mary is the barista on a sabbatical from Ireland (she is a teacher in Ireland- Her boyfriend is in construction and travels a lot). She is a vibrant blonde who always greats me with a smile. She knows EXACTLY how to make my drink. Between you and I, she is the heart of Remedy. You cannot help but smile when you are greeted by her.

Isaac

Isaac is my new friend who I meet up with at Remedy on a regular basis. He is one of the few positive people I encounter on a regular basis. Isaac has an understanding of women most men lack.
Isaac has a goal to meet and uplift people he comes into contact with on an everyday basis. His is genuine and shows a compassion for people I truly admire.

Zee

Zee is the owner.. He makes the best damn Chai Tea in the universe. Dead serious. Cannot even put into words how much of a fanatic I have become. I blame him for my over expenditures

Mouthwash Man

He is a homeless guy that will come in. I'm certain he is higher than a kite. I feel terrible for him actually. He also has the longest index finger I have ever seen. You may inquire as to how I noticed this but I would retort with "how could YOU NOT notice?!?!"
He often will stay here for about 10 minutes then will get shoed out.

Self Help Girl

This girls is going through the whole section in chapters every second day I swear!
Her current read is: "Changing for Good".
 
The Cook

Chef is awesome. I still don't know his name. He does all the food preparation. I say this and my mouth is watering thinking about the Palak Chana Masala. I think that's what its called? He's here most days and always makes a point of coming out and saying hello. And brings me a napkin because Im forever spilling my tea.

Daniel

He is evening staff. He has curly blonde hair that is always pulled back in a ponytail. He mocks me every time I come up for my drink. He is convinced I am going to turn green from all the pistachio that I have him put in my cup.

Nate
Nate is a graphic student who works casually. The only way to describe Nate is he is like a graffiti painting. He has a wildly creative side and when I speak with him he oozes potential.  He speaks his mind and conversation is usually all over the board.

Cranky Sara
Sara is a new barista. She is very eclectic. However, she lacks social merriment. I am beginning to think she is plotting the end of time. Perhaps its the late night crowd that's getting to her? Regardless, I try to make her smile. Isaac also puts in an honest effort. To no avail, nothing ever changes....sigh... oh Sara...Please smile. If only a little.

"Ohhhh, You're Pistachio Lady!

That would be me. I find a spot. Occupy spot. I edit. I listen to music. I read books. I drink copious amounts of chai. I tip everytime. They kinda love me here. Or so I think... mind you, if my stomach keeps disagreeing with the Chai I may be pondering if they are trying to rid of me....

Remember Your Soxs

 I am a Red Sox fan and so was my grandaddy (who passed away a few years ago). When I lived in Massachusettes gramps and I would watch Martinez pitch a game. We had a blast. We would sit and eat Jelly Bellies all afternoon. I think that is the happiest time I have had with him. When the season would first start I would tell him "gramps, we are so going to win the world series this year?" He would look at me, laugh and say "Sure thing brat".  We would get to play offs and were determined to see those Yanks go down and as always, they wouldn't. After our loss I would tell him "We'll we will get them next year" and he would say "sure will Brat".

He was an incredible individual...I sure miss him.