Decisions. ...

My head I'd spinning in many directions right now. It's been an emotional day (who are we kidding.... week).

There are so many decisions I have to make in the next week and I feel very much alone in this whole process.  Only because...  I am. I want so badly to know the right answers. Check the right boxes.  AND AT THE END OF THE DAY- I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN MAKE THEM.

Decisions that affect where I live. Who is in my life. What my role is and what it will become. Who I make decisions for and vice versa. And what direction my life is headed.

SHIT.  I  want to be 5 again.

....really?

Human Christina Perri - Madilyn Bailey (Acoustic …: http://youtu.be/xtSye1rio40

The light, it's not as bright
The sides are closing in
There is no room to move now
The crescents getting thin

It lays there, barely beating
My weight is pressing down
No matter the direction
The pressures so compound

My arms reach down to lift it
Walls are preventing me
Tears collecting at the bottom
A salted pool forms a sea

Palak Paneer

my most favorite dish....
I have fallen in love with Indian food

Away

You say I'm useless
but I know that's a lie
you say I'm ridiculous
I'm wondering why
You yell and curse
'fuck off' I hear
You say I shut down
I don't want to be near!
I close my eyes
escape the night
I tell you to leave
but where, you can't drive
I wish for an angel
to fly me away
so I may sit on a beach
and tell the best parts of my day
my angel is hear, in spirit you see
so I no longer hear those words
that can cut me so deep
the dust has settled
which direction to go
I see a teal box on the floor
reminding me so...